You Won’t Make Me Feel Bad

You Won’t Make Me Feel Bad

A version of this post originally appeared as a guest post for Jakijellz.com

Readers of my blog will know we are no strangers to a holiday.  Our two and three year old have been on more flights in their little lives than some people have ever. I am not bragging, it is just how it is. Our children are not at school yet and their father’s work give him flexibility so we are fortunate enough to be able to jet off at a moments notice. So we do. Yet our lifestyle choices have been brought into question. The number of holidays we take, the fact I write about them, we publish them on social media, the fact I dared to complain about some of said holidays I am privileged enough to take.

That said, I have said it before and I will say it again, one holiday in Menorca was so damn awful I shudder to think about it. There. I said it again. Deal with it.

Yet I am not supposed to complain right? I was lucky enough to be on holiday. I wasn’t in the office, I wasn’t battling the infamous British summer or winter solo whilst my partner was at work. What an ungrateful cow huh?

Raising children is hard, raising two small children is very hard. It requires an incomparable level of selflessness. I know I am supposed to treasure every moment, but like many of the so say ‘slummy mummys’ out there I appreciate that not every moment is special. Some are infuriating and some are mind numbingly boring.

Some however are priceless. Some moments in this country or abroad are just so bloody special it makes all the bad moments pale into insignificance.

Now I know we don’t need to be on holiday to have these special moments. The difference however, or what is most special about these holidays  and these moments is that we are ALL there.. I am not parenting alone experiencing all the highs and lows whilst Mr Tammy works all the hours missing them.

When we are not on holiday he is not good at taking time off. Like, he never has time off. He works for himself and time off means no pay. He doesn’t have a weekend, we don’t have a weekend, some weeks he doesn’t have a day off, and this can go on for weeks. He certainly will never just ‘have a weeks leave’. Even if he is not in work, work will be happening from home, on the phone, the internet, it is always there. He can’t help himself So those ‘holidays’, those weeks in the sun, in a different country ‘living the life’ that I write about, moan about, and post on social media, they are well earned. They are deserved and for us and they are when we get to be together as a family. My children get to spend time with their father. They love his company when we are away, they always want ‘daddy’ and he has real time for them. Work is not lurking in the background, the work phone is not lingering and the iPad doesn’t have one eye on it all the time. I get to spend time with my partner, real time not just the fews hours before we crash out each night. We get to be a family. I know it might not make sense to a lot of people but it works for us and I will not be made to feel bad about it.

MR Tammy and his children on holiday.
What is more, we are in new surroundings, my children are in new places, broadening their horizons blah blah blah. They will not be brought up afraid of flying, they will approach new places, new experiences, new cultures and new foods with open arms. It is my hope that this level of travel from an early age will help to raise them to be open minded in every sense of the word. I am not saying this is the only way to raise your children with an open mind but again, it works for us.

So I won’t apologise for putting photos of our beachside cocktails on social media. I won’t apologise for writing about our getaways and I won’t be made to feel bad for moaning when they aren’t always perfect. This is how we choose to spend our family time and our money, whilst we can and shame on  anyone who judges me for doing so. Live and let live.

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1 Comment

  1. November 3, 2017 / 8:41 pm

    Why should you apologise?! I’m sorry people have made you feel that way. Send them off to the location independents and the life travellers and then maybe that will shut them up! X

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