Mr Tammy and I have always said we are destined for sunnier climes, you may have noticed our penchant for holidays, despite our recent travel ban. In fact we actually met in foreign sunny lands so our mutual love of a the warmer climate was apparent from the get go.
We have talked about the possibility of a move abroad many a times, we still do. We have always thought if we were to go the best time would be before the children start school or as close to those days as possible. On the basis that the younger they are (hopefully) the more adaptable they will be. Adaptable to a different way of schooling, different language, different way of life. We have it in our heads it would be easier on them to do it at this age. Well the deadline is looming as in just 12 months our first-born will be starting school.
So is it now or never?
Well with such a step there are so many things to consider, obviously.
What about family? I don’t live near mine in this country and I find that HARD. Particularly now that I have children. How on earth would I fair thousands of miles and a plane ride away, let along 90 minutes down the m5? Now of course people will visit and we would come back at time but well it is not the same is it and I really hate goodbyes.
Then theres friends. I hate being away from my friends from home but I have made some wonderful friends in my new(ish) home and the thought of loosing these as well is basically rubbish. Then having to start all over again, meeting new people in a new and unknown language that bit older and for someone who is naturally on the quiet side – yeah not so appealing.
Of course there is also the language barrier. I have loved languages since I can remember, when I was a child I would just sit and listen to people speaking a different language. Weird I know but it fascinated me. I pursued this love right up until my twenties when I became fluent in French and passable in German. That was a long time go however and the need to use them is none existent as I imagine my skills would be now. Whilst I do believe I would be able to and enjoying learning a forgein language, particularly Spanish or Portuguese (our potential destinations) there will still be that initial and difficult transition period where all the admin has to be done, lots of legalities and so on – doing all this with limited language knowledge makes the whole thing so much harder and more daunting.
Then the biggies employment – everyone needs the dollar. Dollar makes the world go round. Country of choice has an impact on this as does your profession. Being legally trained in British law basically limits me to the British legal system. Mr Tammy runs his own business here, there is potential for this to translate or run from afar but it is not that simple for everyone or even necessarily for us. Then again there is language barriers if of course that is an issue. Will the wage translate? Will the work life balance? Will you have to start all over again? It really could make or break the decision.
Of course Brexit shouldn’t be overlooked either, not if you’re staying within the E.U. Yes I am still bitter, no, resentful over it. It has potentially taken something away from us but at the very least has brought about an unparalleled level of uncertainty. It is such a cluster fuck it could be a post to itself, so I will leave it there.
Not to mention, it is scary, really scary. It is the unknown for some that is something to thrive on for those who like a grasp on control, not so much. It is a big thing to uproot your family to the unknown, unknown way of life, culture, people, place and is it fair to put them all through it?
You really could talk yourself out of it couldn’t you? Then when I take a step back and get a grip on the situation and remember my two little ones I remember why it is it is even on the radar. It is that different and potentially better life for them. Of course there is the outdoor element. Like all children my two thrive in being outside. They run everywhere and are genuinely so much happier to be out and about. Being somewhere where this is an option for 300 days of the year, without needing copious layers or waterproofs sounds perfect. Somewhere where life is lived outside and not largely spent within the four walls of your house. In fact all of our family adore the sunshine and warmer days and it is without doubt a huge factor in the decision-making.
Then there are the opportunities it could bring the children, educational, languages, sports, cultures. I am not saying they do not have advantages or options in the U.K as they do but I can’t help but feel there is more available to them, as I become more and more disillusioned with life and education for young people in this country
Both my children, but my daughter in particular have health related issues, not serious ones but difficult to manage at their age, or any age really that are improved in the better weather. Seriously. Not perfect but certainly better. My daughter is under consultant care and potential treatments are surgical. This just seems bonkers when a life in the warmth could have a similar and incredibly less invasive effect.
Then there is their father. He works long hours and is under lots of stress. I know who isn’t? But it is not good for him, or the family. It impacts on his health and wellbeing and the knock on effect on the family is notable. If it is within your grasp to reduce this, to improve stress levels and wellbeing for everyone is it something that should be overlooked or discarded as a pipe dream.
I don’t know about you but I always feel I am rushing everywhere, rushing through life to get from one thing to the next without slowing down to enjoy it. I wonder if this hailed ‘Mañana’ mantra of the mediterranean is actually the answer to a better quality of life for everyone, Mr Tammy and his workload included. I am sure we cannot be the only people who have ever looked further afield for this reason?
Then what about YOLO – you do after all only live once. Is now the time to grab the opportunities and make the most of them while we are still young and our family can reap the benefits. Do we want to wait until our 60s to retire abroad and ‘wish we had done it sooner’.
I don’t know. Well I think I might
What do you think? Could you emigrate? Have you? Are you an expat? Or is there no place like home here in the U.K or wherever it may be for you? I’d love to hear from you.