This isn’t the post you think, this isn’t me begging my toddlers not to grow up too quickly because toddlers are such a joy. Trust me on that one, this is not that post. This is what I wish someone had told me when I was sneaking a bottle of voddy out of the cupboard, when I thought blue eye shadow was the way forward and choosing tops based on the level of cleavage they would provide.
When I was a child all I wanted to do was ‘grow up’. Do something my years wouldn’t allow. Be it drinking, driving, ssssh smoking, earning, boys, wearing heels, going to work, having independence. I remember being 13, putting some heels on stumbling across the field behind my house, make up on, handbag on, with nothing in it after all what did I need? Going out of view to spark up. Yes you read that right. I almost didn’t write the words for fear my Grandmother might read them. Here’s hoping that one is lost on her.
I was forced to grow up quickly as a child, I think to some extent the oldest of a bigger brood always does. My brood, rather my mum’s brood, consisted of a severely disabled son, (my younger brother) and a daughter with considerable learning difficulties (my younger sister) as such they needed the attention. That is not a woe betide me statement and I am not bitter about it, not now anyway, ha. It is just the truth, the younger children do need attention and the disabled, REALLY need the attention. So the eldest who is able to dress, shower, and feed themselves does and then some.
I wonder if that growing up quickly had an impact on my desire to age. Age, oh the irony. You see mentally you feel like you are ready, like you are grown up but in reality you are far from it. So far.
I wish I hadn’t. I wish I hadn’t wanted to grow up so quickly. Life is short yes, but it shouldn’t be wished away. That naive innocence should be treasured, it is a blessing. Remain youthful whilst you are in your youth. Enjoy the things designed for your age.
There is no shame in that.The way you wear your make up is stunning but the way look without it is immeasurable. Your figure is to die for but never forget that less is more. Have a drink and enjoy it but don’t drink to excess you don’t know your limits yet and you don’t need to.
None of this is to say don’t wish or want for anything. Not to aspire or dream. Just to be patient. The world will be there waiting for you when you are ready. Your time will come, but you may regret it if it comes to early. Adulthood is great yes, it gives you opportunities, experiences and power over your own choices but so is childhood. You have a freedom you’ll never have again and an ignorance that can be truly innocent. Savour it, don’t grow out of too quickly, don’t grow up too fast.